Che Guevara T-shirt

I'm back! Let's do this thing!

So I just returned on Tuesday from a visit to Chicago to see my lovely and amazing friend Lani. More on her and Chicago in future posts. But first I know you are dying to hear my thoughts on topical matters. Namely, Sandy and Halloween. For Halloween this year, I dressed as Andrew WK again. And for the second year, not a single person knew who I was, or had any reaction whatsoever. I need to face facts. The Andrew WK costume is just not going to happen.

In fact, the bouncer at the club — a fancy Chicago speakeasy called Untitled — almost didn't let me in. "Is this some sort of costume?" he said, looking at my white jeans and Brooks running shoes.  Yes, yes, it is. Just because I'm not dressed as a slutty cat, no one can identify that I am in costume?

Thankfully, he eventually let me in, and I got in at Paris Club too, meaning that I visited two clubby, bottle-service establishments wearing running shoes. Holla. I may never go back to stilettos, now that the precedent has been set.

Anyway, when I wasn't wearing ridiculously unsexy Halloween costumes, I was on the phone, attempting to reschedule my flight on Monday back to D.C. because I figured it would be canceled due to the hurricane. On Saturday night, Lani went out to DJ and I stayed home for a bit to deal with Delta. Four hours later, Delta finally called me back and I was on the phone with a guy in India when there was a knock at Lani's door.

It's always a little unsettling when you are alone, not anticipating any visitors and you hear a knock, but I decided to open the door. And here is what I saw:


Photo courtesy of Lani!

Lani's neighbor Benny, dressed exactly like this. He wasn't expecting to see me, and I surely wasn't expecting to see him. I was still on the phone with Delta and I tried to close the door but Benny needed help pulling the t-shirt over the cardboard rigging to complete his Che Guevara t-shirt look, so I attempted to yank the t-shirt down in the back while negotiating flight times on the phone, all the while without even explaining who I was to Benny.

Lani said he won $400 in a costume contest for this. Well deserved, no?

Halloween in Fairfax

I happened to be at my parents' house on Halloween night, and was given the task of passing out candy to the little trick or treaters.  My mom bought six bags of candy, and I thought that was way too much.  But sure enough, at 6:30 p.m. there was a knock at the door, and before I knew it, the candy was almost gone. The kids who stopped by were pretty darn cute, but they made me feel out of touch in terms of 2011 cartoon knowledge.  I asked a little girl with blue Pippy Longstockings braids who she was supposed to be, and she held up a tiny doll dressed like her.  "I'm a Loully," she said.  Duh.  Well, okay. I left the bowl of Halloween candy out next to the door, and the next day my mom called to tell me that Rain the dog had eaten all the candy when no one was looking, wrappers and all.  Luckily, I had handed out most of it.  I'd also eaten a good chunk of the candy, including all the dark chocolate, which is dangerous for dogs.  So poor Rain had no adverse effects from her little Halloween adventure. "Some might say that I'm a hero for eating the candy so the dog didn't end up eating it," I told Joe. "You know, if you had put the bowl away in the first place, the dog wouldn't have gotten into it at all," he said. Hmm, yes.  We aren't used to misbehaving dogs.  I suppose this is a good a time as any to note that our beloved dog Hunter has passed on to the rainbow bridge - Halloween would've been his 16th birthday.  That is really old for a dog, I know, but I had begun to believe he would never die.  He'd just always been there, for the majority of my life.  I've been meaning to write a little tribute to him, but let's just say he was practically perfect, much-loved and had the best life a dog could ever have.  He would never have eaten the candy.  Now that Hunter is gone, Rain has no role models in her life and is clearly acting out.

Trick or Treaters, I'm Worried About You!

Halloween 2011 marked my laziest Halloween ever. I thought about recycling last year's Andrew WK costume. No one understood it last year and it deserves another chance. Plus, this year he had a contest for the best Andrew WK impersonator and the winner got a congratulatory phone call from the man himself. Surely I would be in the running? I ran out of contact lenses, so I would have to go as the "bookish" Andrew WK.

But no, I was so lazy that I didn't even bother putting on the Andrew WK uniform of white jeans and sneakers.  I had a party for work on Saturday evening, so I just showed up at Carolyn's boyfriend's Halloween party wearing my formal wear, and Carolyn was nice enough to give me a witch's hat.  Done and done.  They went all out for the party, with fake skeletons, dry ice, strobe lights and a lethal looking Halloween punch.  So fun!  Plus you couldn't get a better location, right near the Black Cat.

I left after 2 a.m. and the cabs were just not stopping.  I had to wait for the bus, but I didn't mind since you can't find a better day for people watching than Halloween.  There was a fake Princess Beatrice arguing with her boyfriend while wearing that ridiculous hat.  As I walked to the bus stop, a wasted guy started yelling at me. He was dressed as a sailor, could barely walk and didn't look a day over 21.

"Are you Meghan McCain?" he asked as he lurched drunkenly toward me.  [Talk about an obscure D.C. reference.]

His friend started dragging him away, but he kept yelling.  "Because you have big titties and they are all out!"

Number 1.) That is laughably incorrect, and
Number 2.) Sir, how did you arrive at that conclusion given that I am wearing a zipped-up parka?

Ha.  I think that says more about his impression of Meghan than it does about me.

The more people I saw as I waited for the bus, the more I started to worry about them.  Who could be an easier mugging target than a drunk guy wearing a cow costume?  What about the girl teetering on her heels while being supported by a guy who is asking, "OK, so where do you live?"  Oh you, hapless, hapless Halloween people.  God help you, as you make your way home at 3 a.m. in the cold while dressed as a Rubik's cube.

I walked briskly to my street after getting off at the bus stop.  A super hero-costumed guy weaving his way across the sidewalk stopped me as I was about to turn onto my street.

"Excuse me.  Which way is south?"

Cardinal directions are not my forte.  "Where are you trying to go I asked?  Dupont?" I said.

"South," he said.  "Just south."

Hope he made it!

Adele WK

I got the cape in the mail. Ohhhh man. That is all I have to say about it at this juncture.

Let's talk Halloween instead. I take this holiday very seriously, as you can see by last year's retro tennis costume. The thing I really liked about that costume was wearing sneakers out instead of heels. That was a game-changer.

So this year, I tried to think what I could be that involved wearing sneakers. And clothes I already owned. An then I had a flash of inspiration. I would dress up as Andrew WK.

My personal hero. The man, the myth, the legend.

I had already watched his television show when I was in high school, and partied at his club in NYC, so dressing up like him seemed like the next natural step. I think he would be flattered by this. Not reaching for the restraining order.

And if you are asking "Who?" right now, you are not alone. Not everyone remembers a pop-metal rocker with a circa-2001 hit called "Party Hard". I would say that 75% of people I told about my costume idea didn't know what I was talking about. However, the 25% who did know thought it was awesome.

It was for those people that I unearthed my fake-blood emblazoned concert tee from a drawer and bought a $18 pair of white jeans to mimic Andrew's trademark white jeans + running shoes look.

But after going to the Stewart rally, my motivation for crowds and ironic statements was at an all-time low.

I managed to venture back out for Halloween.

Here I am, Adele WK. I tried to headbang, but it gave me a headache. That's not very rock star, is it?

Lonely Goatherd

Cape Update: The cape is now on American soil. Unfortunately, I wasn't around to sign for it, so I will have to wait another day.

The suspense is building!

Spotted this Halloween decoration in DC - a cardboard cutout of a goat in the window. Or at least I think it is a Halloween decoration, it could be like this every day for all I know (minus the pumpkin).

Who Wears a Cape? Pt. 2

I bought a cape. It is making its way across the Atlantic now, on its way to my apartment. Via gchat, I told my friend Amy this.
4:03 PM me: i bought a cape online
4:04 PM Amy: hahaha
me: no, not for halloween
for everyday use

Everyone thinks it was for Halloween. Bad timing.

What can I say, I'm a slave to fashion trends. Remember, I have been contemplating purchasing a trendy cape for some time.

My friend Julie is pro-cape.

1:25 PM Julie:i'm glad you're really doing this
1:26 PM
getting a cape

She claims that they were all the rage at this year's Treasure Island - hipsters have no use for sleeves apparently.

In fact, she was so persuasive that I got the color she liked best.

3:30 PM Julie: i like the green one
black would be kinda boring
haha because the last thing you want your cape to be is boring

I will report back when my ASOS cape arrives. D.C., get ready.

To be continued...